*blek*

Reaching out...

Hold my hand...

Walk with me...

I'm scared to walk alone...

Reminder

Reminders
Why reminders?
Maybe cos I never really put thought into it
Pushing it aside and moving all
All of a sudden reality strikes
No I'm not being ignorant
I hope not
I can't deny the impact that it has done
I can't deny the damage that it has done to the people I love
But I hope it is for the better

I used to admire you
But this happen
Do I still admire you?
I wonder

Am I still able to motivate you?
Am I still able to support you?
I want to
As if nothing had ever happen
But reminders
Has been flickering on my mind
Disappointment? Anger? Unforgiveness? Hurt?
Do I feel?
Maybe... I dunno

Fears...
Yes I'm afraid
I'm skeptical about you

Two years have gone by
Was it all in vain?
What does this year promise?
Is this breakthrough ever going to happen?
Hoping, Praying, Believing
God, let it come to pass

I pray,
God please help me rise above my feelings
My fears, my doubts, my circumstances
Show me
That I still can be the motivation force
That dynamites into people's life
I won't let what had happen to stop me from fighting on
The battle is not over
Give me the strength to forgive and believe once again
Give me the ability to see beauty in the midst of imperfection
Let not the passion and burden die
It's not over
No it's NOT....

Sleep

Deprived of sleep again...sigh.. =(

List of current assignments

1) Design Fundamental- Modeling with plastisin..Woohoo...

*chilhood memories.....awwww*

2) Computer Graphics- Short video

*cool... cool...*

3) English - Greeting card with a poem...double Woohoo...

*but waste money, waste time, learn no English*

- Mini Research

*not so mini after all*

4) Media Culture- Some defination?Some essay? some picture?

*Lost on what I'm suppose to do...bleh..*

5) Secret Mission- Something BIG

*Really looking forward to it....Weeeeeeee*

B-a-n-a-n-a

What's with me and bananas these days? Hmmm.... pretty bored of it already actually. Well for the pass 2 weeks, that had become my subject matter for my Design Fundamental assignment- a bunch of banana, banana skin, inside of banana, simplified banana, exagerated banana, distorted banana... I wonder what other aspect of banana I've missed out. Because of this assignment, I've made my family eat bananas for the past 2 weeks....*blek*...

Talking about banana. Come to think about it, I'm sorta a banana as well, yellow on the outside white on the inside. Although I can understand a little sum of Chinese, but conversing vice I can be rather hopeless. And sadly, recently I found out that in some ways I was misjudged for being a banana. Well, now I know the existence of people who has the perception that I view myself as one class higher than chinese educated people. Just because I don't talk that much to people who speaks Chinese, I give them the impression that I'm unsocialble and reserved only to my own kind. What justice does this do to me? I don't speak that much because I can't convey well in Chinese, NOT because I think that I'm better than them. I don't want to start blabling all the Chinese words with funny little rhythms and make a fool out of myself. Sad to know this was how some people thought about me. Now, I've tried conversing a little bit more in Chinese when I feel like it.... not perfect but at least I tried....*blek*

Maybe, just maybe this is God's way of preparing me to get into the Chinese Ministry in church. What had happen actually urged me to speak more chinese. Maybe, just maybe one of these days, I will be able to have a decent conversation with all the aunties and uncles in chinese church. Having a heart is one thing, having the ability to relate to the people is another. So, maybe this is one way God is preparing me for a deeper work in the Chinese Ministry and I'm looking forward to it....=)

Now someone please tell me, Is it wrong to be a b-a-n-a-n-a?